I have recently discovered that I have a very strong disgust for facebook and regular facebook users. Feeling negative feelings towards anyone or anything is never a good thing to carry around in ones aura, so I thought about what good things facebook has to offer. I can acknowledge that facebook is not completely evil; it is a tool which when used at the right time for the right reasons, can be very beneficial to oneself and those who are connected to them via facebook…….but I still can’t help getting a little annoyed at the whole facebook culture when I see so many people using this tool for unhealthy or mundane reasons.
I really love to see people make the most of their time and to use their energy for things which are beneficial to themselves and others. Much time is wasted on social networking platforms such as facebook, and I feel it is a tragedy. This is time that could have been spent contributing to much larger, more important issues in their lives, their community, and the world as a whole. Constant facebooking should be treated as an addiction like any other because it prevents people from living a deeper more meaningful life.
There are many reasons why one would use facebook. I categorized all the ones I could think of under two headings: “good reasons to use facebook” and “not so good reasons to use facebook” Under the “good reasons,” I listed the ways that facebook can help you develop in the areas of business marketing and social contacts, or as a way to share valuable inspiration. In the “not so good reasons” there are listed some rather unproductive reasons or superficial excuses that people may use when justifying their facebook usage.
Good Reasons to Use Facebook:
1. To Market Your Business or Services
Social networking is huge! Most businesses and entrepreneurs can’t compete these days without using some form of social networking. FB is a quick way to get your skills and services know about. It makes it relatively easy for people to read about your business offerings and to pass the information on to others who may be interested. It can be less of a hassle than sending email attachments, and it may also reach a wider range of people. However, not everyone uses facebook as their primary method for receiving communications, so it not recommended to completely replace email newsletters with facebook notifications; use both, and you will reach a wider range of people.
2. To Share Valuable Websites, Pages, etc…
“Liking” or sharing something that you perceive as valuable and want to recommend to others is easy and non-invasive on facebook. Seeing that a trusted friend likes a web page or a video, may make you want to check it out, but it does not make you feel obligated to do so. Facebook gives people the freedom to ignore that kind of thing without feeling bad for deleting an email from someone trying to share pages, photos, or videos that they like. “Liking” or sharing something also helps the person who’s thing you like; word of mouth, or let’s say “word of click,” is one of the best ways to grow an online or offline business.
3. To Post Inspirational or Uplifting Content
Facebook offers a space for people to share inspiring or funny quotes, stories and videos with friends without being too spammy about it. Who doesn’t need a little inspiration or humour in their day? These can also be easily ignored if you are not in the mood for fun or inspiration.
4. To Get in Touch With Long Lost Friends
Facebook makes it easier than ever to search for and get in touch with people you have been out of contact with. Sometimes you loose someones contact information or they change their email/phone number/address without notifying the world – but if they have facebook, you can find them!
Not So Good Reasons for Using Facebook:
1. To Constantly Update Your Status with Ordinary Things
Facebook gives you a free ticket to spill out your most mundane thoughts. But does anyone care? I hope not. Some of the things people post on their wall are not worth the effort it takes to type them. If you catch yourself writing things such as “I bought cool shoes today.” or “I am enjoying this new brand of peanut butter….mmm”. Or “I am tired and need to go to sleep.” maybe it is time to cut your status updating addiction. If you are tired and need sleep, then get off facebook and go to sleep – it’s much more healthy for you and your facebook friends. I pray that people do not wait on facebook to get the next update on your sleep, shoes, or peanut butter. If so, then it’s worse than I thought!
2. To Make Insignificant Comments
Comments are another place on facebook where people can share thoughts that don’t really matter. Yes, some people can have some insights and beautiful things to share in a comment section, but if you find yourself adding “cool” or “great” or “lol”, it can make for unwanted clutter on your friend’s newsfeed. Stopping insignificant comments is also a good test for ones humility. Can you enjoy something that another shared or said, without needing to be be acknowledged that you also thought it was “cool”.
3. To Post Photos Without Discernment
Facebook offers a platform for people to post hundreds, even thousands of photos of themselves. While some photos can be a good way to keep friends and family up to date on certain events in ones life, I still can’t bring myself to put this under the “Good” reasons for using facebook. People often post without any discernment. Those pictures of you completely wasted on alcohol or drugs, or those sexy, almost porn-like photos might be good in your books, but if you have anyone on your friends list who you want to hold a higher opinion of you, then perhaps you should think twice before posting those photos. Also, keep in mind that potential employers may be able to access your account and and boarder crossing authorities can demand to see your facebook page when you try to enter certain countries. If you absolutely must post photos, keep them at a certain level of decency. You may also want to consider another photo sharing platform such as flickr or photobucket; these sites do a better job of displaying your photos, and are much more secure. Not to be forgotten is the seemingly outdated method of sending photos via email, which holds a more personal charm for those viewing the photos you choose to share.
4. To Boost Your Ego
Facebook is a great tool for ego gratification. It’s a whole page all about your status, your interests, your photos, your likes, etc….. it’s all about you! You can also present your life in anyway you choose, and make yourself look really interesting. The time and energy spent building and maintaining ones facebook personality can become consuming for a lot of people. One can run the risk of becoming self-absorbed (see #1 in this section). The ego also loves the confidence boost it receives when your friend count rises or you receive oodles of comments about how wonderful you look in a particular photo. Now, there is nothing wrong with a boost in confidence via facebook, but if you are using facebook as your main means of feeling good about yourself, you may want to dig a little deeper into your reasons for needing this recognition from others. Acknowledgement from other people may make you feel great in the short-term, but it is not a good way to achieve lasting, genuine happiness. You can’t rely on anyone outside yourself to bring you happiness. True happiness does not come from ego gratification, but from going beyond personality and discovering your true nature, which is timeless and faceless.
5. To Live Vicariously Through Others
It is so easy for one to get lost in the world of facebook, only to find their way out hours later. There are better ways to spend your time; if you feel that there isn’t a better way to spend your time that it is a sure sign that it is indeed time for you to seek out a more meaningful life for yourself. Maybe the life people display on facebook looks more interesting than your life, but it shouldn’t be that way. Take more interest in your own life, create your own opportunities and you will be much happier. There is no no need to live vicariously through others, when you can create an awesome life for yourself.
6. To Stalk an Enemy, a Crush, or Someone You Don’t Even Know
Facebook makes it to easy for one to find out an outrageous amount of details about another’s life without them knowing that you know. It’s a bit creepy. It makes no difference if they are on your friends list and they gave you access to their information or if it is someone with a public profile that you have actually never met. If you are routinely visiting someones profile and watching their life more closely your own you might want to figure out why and resolve the underlying issues of loneliness, jealousy, vengeance or whatever other emotion is causing you to facebook stalk someone.
7. To Feel a Sense of Connection With Others
Facebook allows us to keep up to date with more people’s lives than was possible before. However, many fall into the trap of getting carried away in maintaining a connection over facebook, they forget how much more fulfilling in-person human connection can be. If you are looking at someones profile because you want to feel connected with them, then take steps to connect with them in real life. If seeing them in person is not possible, pick up the phone or set up a web cam and log into Skype. You’ll get much more out of connecting with the real person, than you will by checking out their online personality.
Are you away travelling, working, or studying and you cannot meet with your friends in person? It’s still not a good a reason to spend hours “connecting” to others on facebook. You may have a few close people you want to update every now and then, but If you are living on facebook in order to connect with people far far away, you are missing out on opportunities for connecting with real people in your current location.
8. To Stay in Touch With Every Person You Ever Met
Do you really care about all 1,400 people on your friends list? Would you have a coffee with them if they were in your city? If not, then you do not need them on your facebook. Although it can be nice to occasionally reconnect with someone from your past, set some limits to your friend finding. If you did not try stay in touch in the first place, were they really that important to you? It’s true that we sometimes let people who are dear to us slip away, and if you really feel inclined to reconnect, then do so, but choose your re-connections with discernment. Most of the time, if someone is no longer in our life, there is no reason for them to be in our life. People come into and out of our lives for various reasons, and if you are really meant to reconnect with someone, fate will find a way. Trust the working of the universe and don’t feel like you have to keep 1,400 contacts just in case you may want to talk to one of them one day. By clinging on to people from our past, we don’t leave space for the new to come in. Stay open and let the mystery of life unfold. The right people come in and out of your life at the right time, don’t force facebook friendships.
If you are using facebook for unhealthy or mundane reasons, then for your own benefit, and the benefit of everyone else on this planet…..please consider resolving the underlying issues. Recognize facebook as a tool which has certain capabilities, but not as something that becomes your lifeline. There is a higher purpose to you life, and it does not involve telling the world that you liked last nights episode of your favourite TV series.
If you have other “good” or “not so good” reason that someone may use facebook, feel free to post in the comment section below.
Image by Tanatat
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